Fruit Abuse – Report it Here!
by Veronica Grace Patenaude

Oh beloved fruit, how I love thee. But these days I am noticing more than ever that you are not being treated properly or even very well in general. Something terrible has happened to our society. People have forgotten how to choose you, take care of you, cut you and serve you.

This has to stop!

To raise awareness for my dear friends I have compiled all of my best examples to help spread the word and educate people on this nonsense.

Here are some recent examples.

#1. The disgusting conglomerate “fruit salad”.

WHY do they insist on adding oranges or other acidic fruits like kiwi or pineapple into these “fresh” concoctions? It absolutely ruins the flavor of everything. Who wants to eat watery orange flavored melons and grapes. I wish someone would teach them some fruit sense! Not all fruits have to be combined to create a fruit salad, the more fruits the worse the taste.

Preventative measure:
If out at a restaurant, ask if the fruit salad is pre made or made fresh. If fresh ask that they only include fruits of your choice or omit the oranges. If at someone’s house where they’re preparing fruit salad tell them about the effects of acidic fruits on sweet fruits and melons and help them design a colourful fruit salad that won’t compromise the flavor of each fruit.

#2. The sad tale of the unripe banana.

Ever seen a co worker tote an unripe yellow banana to and from work every day? Sitting on their desk, and then going into the fridge and then back on their desk and then back into the fridge? Abandoned and unripe… It just never gets eaten despite their “healthy intentions” such a shame.

Preventative measure:

Ensure your friends and family know how to select a banana and when it is ripe to each. Tell them that the banana should ripen at room temperature for several days after it turns completely yellow and that it is ripe when there are brown speckles all over it. This is when the banana is at it’s sweetest and the starch has been converted into sugar by the enzymes in the banana.

#3. The overworked grocery clerk that slams your apples down on the scale at the grocery check out.

This is one of the most heartbreaking stories. You spent minutes, yes, MINUTES picking out perfectly ripe, unbruised apples. Each one a delicate work of art. Only to make it to the check out and have them callously tossed around and inevitably bruised before you even make it to the car. How could someone be so heartless?

Preventative measure:
Smile and say hello to your cashier. Ask that they be extra careful with your produce and you really appreciate it. Or just use self checkout and avoid the whole situation!

#4. The fruit bowl of death.

You might have seen this at your parents or friend’s house. The iconic bowl of fruit in the kitchen, yet no one is eating out of it. The fruit just sits there to get old and squishy and gets brought out to the table when guests are around only to disappoint them with a watered down lacklustre flavor. Grapes and cherries belong in the fridge people!

Preventative measure:

Talk about how much you enjoy eating fruit, how easy they are to eat and quick and satisfying. Make fruit sound appealing to those around you to include these in their diets every day. Comment on how you love keeping your ripe fruits (peaches, nectarines, grapes, cherries, oranges, lychees and other perishables) crisp and fresh. Let people know that counters are best suited for slower ripening fruits like bananas, melons and apples.

#5. The moldy produce drawer.

You open up the fridge at a friend’s house and notice they have some old decaying fruit or vegetable matter (you can’t tell at this point) in their produce drawer. In fact there’s more than a few abandoned things in here that have seen better days. Your host told you there was “some” fruit in the fridge… I think you’ll be going hungry at this point.

Preventative measure:

To prevent this catastrophe from happening to you inspect your fridge weekly removing any foul smelling or squishy produce. Compost it and make a mental note to only buy what you will consume each week. For friends with mouldy produce drawers tell them it’s too bad their food went to waste. Suggest some recipes or meal ideas for the foods that were spoiled so they have an easier time remembering what to do with them next time around.

#6. The tupperware of old fruit.

Your aunt always keeps some cut up fruit in a tupperware container in the fridge. The unfortunate part is that it never gets finished and keeps going from fridge to table every meal. The fruit is cut up but getting mushy and watered down by now and is past it’s prime. Sadly she does not know that fruit can be enjoyed a better way. (Do not abuse your watermelon this way!)

Preventative measure:

Consume cut fruit within the same day or at most 2 days. It is at its freshest and most flavorful the same day. Encourage everyone at the table to take a slice or two of fruit and make sure that it is finished that meal. For the next meal cut up some new fruit and serve it fresh and watch people wonder in amazement at the difference in flavor and texture! Insist that you eat a lot of fruit and enjoy preparing it fresh for each meal.

#7. Eating fruit at the end of a meal.

Quite often people want to end their meal with something sweet, whether it’s a dessert, coffee with sugar or some fruit. What they don’t realize is that eating fruit on top of heavy foods like meat, dairy or bread is really doing your body a disservice. It creates a poor environment for digestion and the fruit sugars begin to ferment on top of the previously eaten food items causing bloating, gas and blood sugar swings.

Preventative measure:

Eat fruit first before the meal or as a snack 20 to 30 minutes beforehand. This ensures your body has enough time to digest this water rich food and not cause any digestive upset or blood sugar swings. Encourage your friends and family to do the same. Let them know they’ll crave less heavy foods for their meal and inevitably be more energized and possibly lose weight too!

#8. The notorious garlic-onion fruit.

Have you ever noticed how the taste of raw garlic and onions permeates every food you eat? Especially fruit? Many times restaurant staff use the same cutting board to cut fruit on as they do garlic or onions so inevitably your “delicious” fruit plate ends up tasting like onion watermelon or garlic pineapple. TRULY disgusting.

Preventative measure:

ALWAYS use a separate cutting board for vegetables than fruits. Wood and plastic cutting boards retain the oils from garlic and onions and pass them on to other foods. Ask your waitress to ensure that the kitchen staff does not cut your fruit on the same cutting board as those items. Tell your family and friends to use two separate cutting boards when preparing foods for entertaining such as vegetable trays and fruit platters. Your taste buds will thank you.

So now you’ve been informed, help spread the word. Educate your friends and family about proper fruit conduct and how to enjoy fruit at its prime.

Let this be the beginning of a new day for fruits everywhere. A brighter tomorrow where there are more educated people who can handle you and appreciate you properly. Children who will know how to select and when you are ripe for peak enjoyment.

Have you witnessed any fruit abuse? Report it here!